taste-testing blog: February 2011

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Eighties Versus Nineties!

Ahh - almost made a typo there; almost, almost typed Eighties Vs Nighties instead...!
*lol*

Kinda betrays my state of mind, eh?
;)


But we are digressing here - back to the subject at hand, pronto!

In this corner, representing the eerie 80's, a whole bunch of videos starting with THIS ONE:



For the complete playlist, with over 180 titles - click here (yeah - one hundred eighty! It is one hundred eighty-eight, exactly! Aren't you glad now I resisted the urge to write individual comments for each video/song as I usually do here - hmm? You will find a playlist or two for the nineties too, fear not: but let's not dwell too much on that now! Let's just carry on...!)

Speaking of the nineties... indeed...
For the somewhat less-than inspired 90's, thus, we'll have only THIS:



See what I mean - all ol' Axl could find to do, it would appear, was to record a cover version of a classic not from the 80's but from a decade prior, the stupendous 70's! Not only is it merely a cover, it is a BAD cover to boot - believe you me, when you listen to the original by Paul and his gang, there is no comparison to be made! Case CLOSED!)

My luminous (even if a tad hasty; but it is all on purpose, you see?) decision stands thus and it is no delusion: THE EIGHTIES WIN!

Stay tuned for star-studded competition!
Wooooooooooooo!

;)

Wednesday, February 09, 2011

DC = Driving Contest!

In our series that tries to explain what in blue blazes could "DC" mean, we bring you today something with added meaning - for it will also answer the question "which song you'd rather be listening to while behind the wheel!"

(And no, the crazy drivers behind the wheel at those wacky races need not apply!)






Let's start with the obvious choices:







DRIVE - THE CARS (they know their stuff; however it is indeed "Who's Gonna Drive You Home" - designated driver requested here! A recurring theme, as we will soon see...)

What an unforgettable haunting classic this is!

Never mind the ghostly charisma of Benjamin Orr and the surreal presence of Ric Ocasek - it is the latter's former girlfriend who stars and shines in the original video for this immortal piece that, even without a "video-concept", stand on its own as a superior song rife with meaning and multiple possible interpretations that lend the tune such a huge mass-appeal, which in turn easily explains why the song is such a great unforgettable classic in the first place!

Ocasek's ex though is the true reason why the video is memorable in any way at all - she attempts, quite believably and successfully at times, to actually ACT in this video - and, just a myriad other models both before as after here, the results are half-baked. And yet... She could have easily been the first Milla Jovovich - that is, if she had the faintest notion of martial arts combat, any character to speak of (standing up to and arguing with skinny, pencil-necked Ocasek does not really count as character, sorry) and actual genuine thespian talent there! She does cry in a very believable way though at some point in the video - but then again, any capricious child can convincingly summon up the tears when they want to obtain something at all costs...! Ocasek's former flame is just that here, alas - but a spoiled brat! A sexy, woman-child kind of brat - but a brat nonetheless! What was here name again, anyways...?!? Never mind...

Truth i, nowadays, equally-convincing acting can be found on a weekly basis on America's Next Model or something...!

Reality TV shows do not have such great music though as this classic from the 80s!

For the lyrics to this classic track, check here; aye, the vidiot made his video unembeddable! Well, free world, free choice to make...




Next turn...

JESUS TAKE THE WHEEL - Carrie Underwood
The very best designated driver you can hope for - and he never got His license, imagine that! These tiny pieces of recyclable paper are worthless anyways, in the Grand Scheme of Things; even when they are plastified! JESUS CHRIST - The Saviour Can pilot cargo jets ANY TIME HE WANTS TO! Let alone drive an itty-bitty motorized vehicle doomed to remain grounded evermore; most probably a second-hand car too, given that Underwood doesn't make the kind of money that a Rihanna or a Mad-Onna makes... Alas... That tells tons about the layman's taste (or lack thereof) in terms of music, I tell ya folks...
But we are digressing now...




Next lane...

I CAN'T DRIVE 55 - SAMMY HAGAR
The guru of reckless driving forevermore; for Sammy here concocted *the* song that justifies all speed excesses ever perpetrated on the road ever since! One guesses that he can live with that responsibility now...

(Hey - if Van Halen took him on as their own designated driver, albeit for a very short while, he can definitely live with the guilt now; the moment a bunch of grungy musicians like Eddie give you their stamp of approval, there is no self-doubt anymore there! The story doesn't tell if Valerie Bertinelli approved or not though... But this is but another digression here...!)




Next pit stop...

DRIVE - INCUBUS
I wonder if these guys ever saw the film "Incubus" with John Cassavetes and that brown-eyed chick: it boggles the mind if they did and then decided to go with that name anyway... This tune makes me think of the upstart race car driver who goes past everyone early on in the race - only to wind up in a pile up of wrecked metal at some turn and doesn't even complete the race in the end! It leaves the listener still waiting for that certain something - that certain something that never does come, in this notable case here! Songs like that abound and are, literally, a dime a dozen (especially in this day and age of file-sharing and all! But that is another story - and Lime Wire is dead, at any rate, so no beating a dead horse - or any engine totally out of horsepower!) In any case, these guys' "driving song" has become an instant favorite and is played relentlessly throughout the land on any commercial radio pack or any store's rotational musical loop - it remains out of this blogger's personal faves list though, despite its semi-optimistic chorus line "whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there!" Yeah - whatever! The incubus from the movie was always there, too, whatever the circumstance was indeed - such a lyric is therefore, quite unintentionally (I am sure) but undeniably creepy!

Speaking of awful films with great names associated, somehow, with them; any talk of fast cars and bankable stars has to conjure up talk of The Fast And The Furious with Paul Walker and Vin Diesel leading the way: Jordana Brewster and that Dwayne dude simply do not matter here, really (what are their claims to fame, really: she kissed a blonde for countless hours in some parody of Charlie's Angels and was cast there only due to her incredible resemblance to Demi Moore (which, I always said, is much better than resembling Dudley Moore or Roger Moore nowadays!) and he is just one of those wrestlers whose greatest attempt at trying to prove that he truly can act came when he got dressed up as a... fairy. Sheesh.)

At least Walker has acting chops - while Diesel, though a failure as Roddick and XXX, definitely puts gas in these movies' tanks (I had to make that funny, sorry; couldn't resist!)






UPDATE: Rest In Peace Paul Walker   








I simply cannot believe they're up to FIVE movies, though...
Although they did choose a great locale for the latest one: my beloved Brasil!



But enough cinematic crapfests - for now, that is!




Next curve...

SHUT UP AND DRIVE - RIHANNA

Now there's a classic tune, eh - classy too.
Peer through the lyrics now, if you will:





Next road...

DRIVE ON - JOHNNY CASH
The great, late Johnny Cash is one of those incontournables - whatever the subject, he will be there and bring something extremely relevant to it. 'Nuff said!




Next spin...

DRIVE ON - BY A KENNY CHESNEY COPYCAT!
Charlie Durham is quite excellent as far as copycats go though - I guess it is one of those cases where the original artist and the imitator could be mistaken for one another, when you simply listen to the tune without any visual input!




Next ride...

RIDE ON - CHRISTY MOORE
But is it really a "Christy" singing though... Anyway - nice song!




Next green light...

RIDE ON - CRUACHAN
Now here, at least, the voice is truly feminine...




Next exit...

RIDE ON - RAMPALJE
Another version of this haunting song...




Next bump on the road...




RIDE ON - AC/DC
The execrable band of misfits sounds as rambuctious as ever here, eh... "Just another empty head" he sings - so true!




Next - a red light! Burned!

Taking a turn towards cinematography now (and taking a little simulpost twist as well, as this belongs on another of our outlets here on the TLB Prime Network! Just saying...) - as this forgotten piece of wasted celluloid features two songs and one particular scene (above) that reeks of all the dangers associated with driving. Especially when there is a lunatic on the road with you! The song that would have been perfect though is another tune called "Ride On" by a band called Lulabox - alas, the twit that uploaded this flick on YouTube dismissed the end credits completely and the song is only heard THERE. Truly indicative of today's audiences who care not about the many names associated with any given production, care not who are the artisans behind the scenes, care not about any single thing but the fast consumption aspect of goods - in this case, a cheap thrill flick quickly dismissed once the evening is over with! But I am digressing...










Luckily, with YouTube, you can find everything...


RIDE ON - LULABOX

Okay - it is another kind of ride that is implied there; and an entirely different pit stop as well... And not as subtle nor as merely metaphorical as Rihanna's innuendo either! Edgier it is - that is for sure! Lulabox was, perhaps, too edgy for its own good: mixing stylishness of the Eighties (à la Visage) with neo-punk sounds and glitz, with the whole thing coated in an emballage that would make Mad-Onna proud - it was a bit of overload for its limited audience back then, we can guess...




With all that in mind, one can only advise one thing, one supposes: DRIVE ANGRY! Advocating road rage is far from our minds here, though: we simply want to make sure you stay focused on the road and concentrate on what you're doing when we are walking around as Luminous Pedestrians! And so it is truly in that light that we introduce the next clip here - it had to be here - and it is indeed DRIVE ANGRY...!











Best described as "Ghost Rider trades in his lousy bike for a car, finally" this flick appears to be even better than the Rider bomb ever was. The only logic behind a devil's emissary tracking down an escapee from hell bent on mass murder would be that each soul that is murdered gains grace in the Eyes of God - which would definitely not serve the cause of hell in that case. But I am simply not sure that such a notion even crossed the script writers' minds in this case - at all. Still... Between the abominable Ghost Rider, the formidable Kick-Ass and now this Drive Angry, I suppose that Nic Cage really has proven that he likes super-heroics indeed; he certainly does not shun from them, that is for sure! And that sure must count for something, right? Call this good behavior Dastardly Championing a worthy cause! Bonus points for having Amber Heard onboard for this... And wasn't our first definition of "DC" tied into super-heroics, anyway...? I think so... I can't seem to recall now, for some odd reason... Peculiar, is it not...! ;)



I suppose that we could not avoid having a bit of ROAD RAGE here as well...


ROAD RAGE - CATATONIA
Somehow it always fails to capture the essence of its theme, no?
Oh well...



Dreamers like to keep on truckin' - figuratively, that is.
FOR BEHEMOTHS OF THE HIGHWAY ALSO HAVE ASPIRATIONS...!
Hence, we simply must add to this compendium of roadies the classic KEEP ON TRUCKIN song - in all of its variants!


KEEP ON TRUCKIN - GRATEFUL DEAD



KEEP ON TRUCKIN - EDDIE KENDRICKS



KEEP ON TRUCKING - DAVE DUDLEY



KEEP ON TRUCKING - THE ROAD HAMMERS




Speaking of dreaming on though -
DATING AND DRIVING ARE INTIMATELY CONNECTED -we all know that- and, of course, gas prices are always a concern too; so add it all up and you can get the sort of farce with very crude innuendo that follows:



FILL UP YOUR TANK - KAMPAIGN & JAMES DAVIS




Let us snap out of it already though - NOW - either by taking a cab or, quite simply, with this reality check straight out of the good ol` innocent EIGHTIES:


GET OUT OF MY DREAMS / GET INTO MY CAR - BILLY OCEAN





and finally... KAVINSKY`s NIGHTCALL - from the DRIVE original movie soundtrack! (hey, he claims to want to drive her through the night, down the hills...?!? He deserves to be added here!)







Drive off wherever you want to now!


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